Memories From China...

Before traveling to China, when we received photos of Carson from our adoption agency and from people who traveled to the Hefei orphanage ahead of us (which are all displayed down the left side of the blog), I framed 'em all. Some of them are even framed in multiple locations throughout the house. I wanted Carson to enter this house knowing he belonged...there is at least one picture of him in every room of our house, including the bathroom!

Now that Carson is speaking so well, he has started to talk about some of his memories of China. This actually started because of a photo collage that hangs in his bedroom. Remember when Meggie made this:
Meggie made the collage of the infamous "pink backpack photos" (taken by Pam and Robert when they traveled in July of 2007 to adopt their daughter) and we framed it and hung it in Carson's bedroom. Every night as he falls asleep, he turns his head in the direction of that framed collage. He has asked about those photos often, which always prompts a conversation about China. A couple of weeks ago as I was getting Carson ready for bed, he told me, "I sad in China." When I asked him why, he responded, "I sad in China 'cause I not have a Mommy."

Wow.

I swallowed hard and tried to keep it upbeat. (That nearly brought me to tears!) I said, "That's right, you didn't have a Mommy in China. But you have a Mommy now!" He smiled the sweetest smile and agreed, "I have a Mommy now."

Another conversation about China prompted by a "China picture" brought the revelation that he didn't have many toys in China. On the orphanage visit, we got to go into his classroom in China and saw toys. I said, "You had toys in China, didn't you?" He said, "Only two cars." Could it have been that he played with the toys in his classroom but only had two cars to play with in the foster home? Hard to say.

Since he knew of Ultraman so well (which surprised our guide in Hefei), I reminded him he watched Ultraman movies. "No," he said, "Ultraman on TV. But TV broke." Could that explain his desperate addiction to TV...fearing it won't be around forever??

I struggle. Do I take down all the "China pictures" in an effort not to upset him? Or do I leave them up, continue the conversations, and help him process the difficult realities of the first four years of his life?

Since we definitely don't want Carson to forget his time in China -- and since he will need our help in processing whatever struggles those memories create for him -- the photos are staying put. I toyed with the idea of removing the photo collage...but decided against it. Instead of removing it, I put this picture on Carson's nightstand (which sits right underneath the photo collage)...
...a picture of Carson and Mommy together. Now when he tells me, "I sad in China 'cause I not have a Mommy," he continues, "but I have a Mommy now!!"

Oh, Little Man, you have a Mommy now...and how lucky that Mommy is to have YOU!

Halloween Should Be MIGHTY Interesting This Year...

When Meggie was young, dress-up was her favorite thing to do. If she couldn't find a dance costume that suited her mood, she would get out a paper bag, construction paper, scissors, and tape and create something unique. (You think I'm kidding??) I honestly thought dress-up was just a girl thing. Clearly, I was wrong.

When Carson came home from China, he was digging through his new toys and found a Superman action figure, complete with cape. Carson immediately thought he was cool and Superman took the ultimate place of honor...he became a favorite bathtub toy.

Carson has always been obsessed (to put it mildly) with Ultraman. Since Ultraman is hard to find in the U.S., we tried to substitute Power Rangers. With their helmets and jumpsuits, they looked as close to Ultraman as anything we could think of. He was fooled for a while...and was thrilled that the costume Aunt Debbie gave him for Christmas came with a toy gun!
Carson soon discovered Spiderman and decided he looked more like Ultraman than the Power Rangers did. When he started preschool, the boys told him about Spiderman...and his obsession transferred. His AFOs became his "Spiderman boots" and the wrist splints he wears to bed suddenly became web-shooters. He also began his habit of walking two steps and jumping into his Spiderman stance, like this:
Then the Backyardigans (one of his favorite shows) went on a pirate ship adventure, and he became fascinated with pirates. Luckily, Pirates of the Caribbean had a McDonald's promotion right about that time and Carson got pirate scarves in his Happy Meals:
In the mess that Carson's toys have become, he couldn't find the pirate scarves one night last week, so he asked me to make him into a pirate. In the stress of trying to finish my last project for school, I hurriedly ripped a piece of paper and put it over his eye with the help of a rubber band. He grabbed a funnel from his rice activity box and we had a pirate, complete with eye patch and "Hook" hand:
When we bought Carson a DVD with the original Batman cartoon episodes on it, he gave Spiderman a break and decided that Batman is the coolest thing ever! Last Friday, Daddy was at Target and found this get-up:He wants to wear that thing EVERYWHERE!! Daddy let him wear the mask to the grocery store on Saturday -- needless to say, they got a bit of attention for it -- but we had to draw the line at letting him wear it to Church on Sunday.

So now we have a dilemma...what is Carson going to be for Halloween?

If anyone happens to run across an UltraBatSuperSpiderPowerPirate costume, PLEASE let me know!

Carson's Mommy Finally Finished School!!

After 18 LONG months of evening classes, endless papers and projects, and various practicum experiences -- all while working, keeping up with Meggie's crazy schedule, and going to China to adopt Carson in the middle of it all -- I finished school this Thursday!!! YEAH!!!

Our final project had to be handed in Thursday at 6PM. I was up past midnight working on it every night this week and decided that Wednesday I wasn't going to bed until the project was finished. At 2AM Thursday morning, I printed off the last page and happily went to bed! Daddy took a vacation day and took Carson to OT, then dropped him at my friend Sarah's house for a playdate with Selleck and Slade. (Thanks, Sarah -- I owe you BIG TIME!) I slept in, made myself a big breakfast, then laid on the couch and watched some of my DVR'd programs that I had missed all week. When Meggie woke up and saw me lounging, she knew I was finally a free woman!! She ran into the family room and gave me the biggest hug -- telling me she was so happy for me and how proud she was that I finished my degree! What a great kid!!

Thursday evening, our class met only for an hour (basically to hand in our projects and report on what we learned) then we headed up to the meeting room and had our Pinning Ceremony. Pinning is a symbolic welcoming of new nurses into the nursing profession and is actually something we all already did when we finished nursing school. Pinning wasn't the goal this time...this time we got our degrees...but since it is the traditional end of this program, we had one. My friend/co-worker/co-class-rep/partner-in-crime, Gina, did 98% of the planning for the event (I helped a bit) and the ceremony was really nice! Since I was the Mistress of Ceremonies and made a speech, I obviously couldn't take pictures. Meggie and Daddy did a great job in my place.

Here, we have a rendering of the degree we earned, in an unusual medium...
...yes, that is a "BSN" (for Bachelor's of Science in Nursing) made entirely of fun-sized candy bars! Do we know how to party or what??

Here is a picture of me, making my little introductory speech...
...Gina making her speech (it was so sweet, she got so choked up)...
...and our classmate, Karen, giving her speech.
Rather than recite the Florence Nightingale Pledge (which, again, we all did at the end of nursing school), we had a Blessing of Hands. It was so cool. Here is a pic of Jason (one of the instructors) blessing my hands:
Is it just me, or does it look like Carson is up to something??
Doesn't he look so cute in his tie and vest?? When I received my pin, the instructor who was reading the names told the crowd that we had adopted Carson in the middle of the program. She then told Carson to wave to the crowd. He smiled meekly while sitting on Daddy's lap, then waved to everyone. It was so adorable!!

Here is a group shot of RNBS 212, with three of our instructors:
My friend Sarah told me that all day, while enjoying the playdate with Selleck and Slade, Carson kept talking about "Mommy's party tonight." Here is my Little Man with me after the ceremony...
...and enjoying a big piece of cake...also known as the REAL reason he was "es-sited" about Mommy's party!!
Here is Carson playing with some of the other kids. Wait a minute...he's just playing with the GIRLS! Whatta stud!
Meggie's friend (and Carson's first love), Sarah, came along to the ceremony. This is the pic I entitled "The Best Teenagers in the World" after they helped us set up the room for the evening and served the food with Gina's daughter, Olivia:
Carson wanted to "make a speech," too! Is it me, or does he look like a Preacher Man in this picture?? Hysterical!
After the ceremony, we headed to Applebee's for dinner with Gina and her family. Here, Carson is chumming it up with Gina's husband, Jamie:
Gina and I met for dinner before class every Thursday -- in fact, we went to Bob Evan's so frequently that Ruth (our favorite server) began to know our drink orders before we ever placed 'em! -- and got the title "The Wonder Twins" from Gina's daughter, Olivia. It has become our catch phrase, even at work! One last pic of the Wonder Twins:
"Shape of...a graduate! Form of...a woman who has regained her free time!" (Does ANYBODY remember that cartoon??)

Our actual cap-and-gown graduation is August 9th...more pics to come after that big day! Now I'm off to do something fun. After all, I actually have free time again!!!!

Bowling...Video Games...and a Lot of Pouting!

Our dear friends, Chris and Shannon, organized a Family Fun Night for members of our Sunday School class (Chris is our teacher) on Saturday night at a local bowling alley. Kevin and I were in a bowling league when we were newlyweds (hey, it was a cheap Saturday night out!) but it has been a L-O-N-G time since we've tried to bowl...a L-O-N-G time!! It ended up being Chris and Shannon and their girls, our friends Tim and Lisa and their family, and us...we had so much fun!!

Of course, ever the blogging geek that I am, my camera was at the ready. I only wish I had gotten a group shot! (Didn't think of it, actually!) When we showed Carson the ever stylish bowling shoes and told him he couldn't wear his "Spiderman boots" with 'em, he was "so es-sited!" But Daddy made a horrible, rookie mistake right after the shoes were put on...he let Carson play a video game.

I absolutely, utterly hate video games. Besides being disgusting germ repositories for every snot-nosed, no-I-didn't-wash-my-hands kid in the joint, they take kids away from "family" time and suck them into the dreaded "video game coma." Since this was family night, I didn't even want to open that can of worms. Daddy had different ideas. Of course, as soon as I saw it, I wanted to kill dear Daddy. (Kidding...sort of...)

The other problem is that, to Carson, TVs, videos, and electronics are an absolute utter addiction! He wakes up every morning asking to watch TV and spends the entire day, all the way to bedtime, continuing in his eternal quest for video stimulation. We have made the rule that if he asks, then the answer will be no...he is to wait for us to offer TV or a video. When he continues to ask, we say, "Carson, what is the rule?" His answer, invariably, is "Don't axe. Watch TV NOW??" Ugghhhh.... That obsession with all things video was launched with one video game...and created an ugliness in our little tunnel-visioned video addict that cannot be matched. He wanted to PLAY THAT GAME!

After letting Carson finish his game, I explained to him that we were at the party (which is what we were calling this outing to get him excited about it all day) to bowl, NOT to play with the games. He was SO angry with me. So, this is how our evening of bowling began:
Meggie brought her friends, Jacqueline and Morgan, along -- partly to have more fun bowling with her boring family and partly because we were dropping them at a real party after bowling was over:
Hey, Carson, it's time to bowl. Carson? Carson. CARSON!!!!
That would be a picture of Carson refusing to look at me 'cause he was mad at me. Sorry, Little Man, but I never promised you video games tonight -- and remind me to kill your Daddy when we get home tonight...

I finally convinced the Little Meany-Butt -- oops, I mean the Little Man -- to bowl. Here we have Mommy helping...and look at Morgan's excellent bowling form in the background!
In between being forced to take his turn, this is where Carson sat.
By the way, he is staring directly at the video game that he played earlier in the evening. When we turned his chair so the video game was not in his field of view, this is what we got:
And they say women are moody! Yikes! Meggie and her friends tried to cheer him up:
Wait, is that a smile?? Is it working???
Nope. He's back to being stone-faced and angry. Here, Morgan and Jacqueline are helping him bowl and trying to get him excited about his efforts:
Thanks, girls, but he's a lost cause at this point. I only took one more picture of bowling, this time with Daddy...
...then I put my camera away 'cause I'm fairly certain I was annoying everybody with my camera.

Much like Wendy's husband, Tim, Chris and I share a friendship based on mutual aggravation. We are very competitive -- not typically in sports, usually in wit -- and, let's face it, Chris, you don't always win. I wish I had gotten a picture of Chris and I sparring...it was the fun of the night! We bowled two games and, while I won't give the EXACT scores, let's just say I ended up "breaking 100" at the end of the first game (a typical goal for a bunch of pathetic bowlers, which we mostly were) and Chris did not. Again, without giving EXACT scores, I will tell you that my score was 35 pins higher than Chris' score. As we struggled neck-and-neck through the second game, the final score ended up with us BOTH "breaking 100" -- and Chris beat me by ONE STINKIN' PIN!! ONE!!

Chris couldn't stop himself -- he kept rubbing it in and irritating me so badly for winning by one stinkin' pin!! Ever the sweet, generous person that I am (yeah, right), I allowed him to continue in his manly swaggering as he rejoiced with a one-pin victory...knowing in my head that I (and many of the children, actually) thoroughly crushed him the first game. The male ego is so funny!! And Lisa crushed everybody (including all the men) the second game with a final score of 158!!!

By the way, Chris, I'm looking forward to your next Sunday School lesson on humility...

Today is Daddy's Birthday!!

Today, dear ole' Daddy turned -- should I tell you?? -- 42 years old!! Since we met when he was 21 that means I have officially known this man half his life!! Geez, honey, are you shocked we've both survived this long?? (I sorta am...)

We were set up on a blind date way back in 1987 by Daddy's cousin, David (well, actually, Aunt Edna claims the credit, since it worked out and we stayed together!) and six weeks later...yes, you read that right...six weeks later, I had a diamond engagement ring on my left hand!!

I was impressed with a few things about this guy when I met him:

1. He had a cool red sports car (hey, I was 18 at the time!)
2. He had a GREAT build (very athletic and muscular -- again, I was 18!)
3. At 21, he admitted to loving and respecting his parents (never a bad sign, right?!)
4. He was the first guy I had dated who had a real job and paid real bills (again, I was 18 -- but that just seemed so grown up!)
5. He volunteered as a coach for a pee-wee soccer team with his friend Dan (I saw some serious Daddy material in that!)
6. He was the most motivated person I had ever met!

Twenty-one years later, the sports car has been replaced by a red four-door pickup truck (gotta fit the car seat in the back) and he has added a few not-so-muscular pounds to that athletic and muscular build (still looks good to me, though). He still loves and respects his parents, he has a GREAT job, he still loves coaching (and playing with) kids, and he's STILL the most motivated person I have ever met!! In addition to that, he has put up with me for 21 years...and while I'm a pretty swell gal, I know I'm tough to live with. (Not a diva EXACTLY, but I know I'm pretty demanding -- and he does spoil me a bit!)

So, Happy Birthday, dear! And don't think you're cooking for us tonight...we're taking you out to dinner!! Of course, that means I have to tell Carson it's your birthday...he's gonna be pretty upset it's STILL not his birthday...

An EXTREMELY Late Post...

The weekend of Memorial Day, our friends Tim and Wendy and their boys, Caleb and Brendan, invited us to go to the zoo with them. Those who know me (or have been reading this blog since our China trip) know that I HATE the zoo. However, in the interest of friendship (I never seem to have enough time for my friends anymore) and motherhood (since kids love the zoo), we accepted their invitation. As life got way too busy, I completely forgot to post the pictures.

Sorry, Tim, I know you were DYING to see your picture on the blog. Here it is:
Actually, Wendy and I have been friends for a few years now. Tim and I, though, have an interesting relationship...we basically just aggravate each other endlessly! He redeemed himself in my mind on this zoo excursion -- he was a complete gentleman and actually insisted on pulling our wagon nearly the whole day. Whatta guy, huh? (Wendy, NOW I see why you married this dude...)

Here are my guys in the petting zoo...
...and Carson petting a filthy, smelly cow. Where IS that hand sanitizer??Oh, yuck, now he's touching a filthy, smelly goat. I know that hand sanitizer is SOMEWHERE in my purse...
Just kidding, actually...there is a hand wash station outside the petting zoo and Carson utilized it appropriately. (Sorry, the nurse in me just sees animals as walking germs.)

Here Carson and Daddy are watching the seal take a nap on a rock:
A group shot of Meggie, Carson, Wendy, Caleb (or "Cable" as I like to call him) and Tim in the background:
I honestly forget what they were looking at...maybe lions?...but Carson let Miss Wendy pick him up so he could get a better look. Oh, look, "Cable" is drinking a Diet Cherry Coke. Didn't you spill some of that on your shirt, "Cable"??
When we got to the bird area, I did not participate. I have an utterly ridiculous bird-phobia. I even hyperventilate if I'm in my car and I see a huge flock of birds flying overhead. I am NOT joking, people. Birds FREAK ME OUT!! Wendy was sweet enough to take my camera into the bird area and get some great photos! (Thanks, Wendy!)

Carson actually fed birds!! Makes my heart race just LOOKING at my baby so close to birds!
Brendan actually let a bird sit ON HIS HAND!! Oh my goodness...
Oh, yikes, now Daddy has a bird on his hand! Good thing I was safely outside the bird area, trying not to think about birds...
The one thing Carson insisted on seeing at the zoo was the "teddy bears." I thought that was SO cute when he said that!! Well, here he is, on Daddy's shoulders, trying to get the bear's attention. He kept repeating, over and over, "Teddy bear, I talkin' to YOU!!" It was cracking me up!!
And here he is, very irritated because the "teddy bear" kept ignoring him!
Another group shot, walking down a shaded path:
Oh, look, Meggie is having FUN at the zoo with her little brother!! Yeah, Meggie!
Carson and Brendan loved the wagon rides...and the pretzel rods we stuck in the wagon were pretty popular, too!
Carson was determined to eat that pretzel rod...so determined, he wouldn't smile for me! At least the teenager looks like she's finally having fun!
Oh, wait, back to normal...
I'll close this out with a picture of Carson and Brendan on a gorilla statue. You could call it "our little monkeys sitting on a monkey":
Thanks for inviting us along on the zoo excursion, guys! While I hate the zoo...a hatred compounded by the fact that I somehow got bird poo on my shorts as we were leaving...it was a fun day out with friends.

Remember, Tim, only two more weeks 'til you get your fried chicken...